Asking For A Daughters Hand ~ Old Fashioned?
By Teri Denison
Is asking a father for his daughter’s hand in marriage old fashioned? To some this might be so, but in our home we have quite a different take on things.
Travis, son-in-law. Les, father of the bride
The title of “father” goes hand in hand with the word respect, and asking for something shows respect. A father has earned this respect because he has stayed the course and raised his daughter through the good and the sometimes very hard times. Our daughters have become treasures to our new sons-in-laws because dad had a big influence in their lives.
He provided food and clothing from infancy until our daughters learned to provide these things on their own. Almost of more importance were the other things he provided; the things that molded our children in character and person.
I remember when bicycles were given so the girls could learn new skills. Dad then became the fix-it man when things were broken. In turn they would tell the neighbor kids that dad was the best fixer and he could fix their bikes too!
Our daughters were given an animal as a pet. This taught them to love and care for something that would depend on them.
A bedroom was provided so they could learn decorating skills – such as painting, matching colors, making furniture selections etc.
Ah, then comes a vehicle for use in teaching how to drive, along with sound advice in picking out a good deal at the used car lot.
Father helped write that first job resume and also helped her understand office politics and how to get along on the job. He rejoiced with his daughters when they graduated from high school ready to take on the world, and provided them a place to stay when they went to college.
Asking a father for his daughter’s hand is the ultimate way of saying thank you for all that you have done for your daughter and I now want the honor of caring for her.
Any person who is worthy of a daughters hand in marriage will want to ask for it. He has recognized the value this daughter has in her father’s eyes and will be willing to put fear aside to do the right thing by going to the father in respect and recognition that he is asking for something precious – someone who has been cared for since her birth.
I know such a father will in-turn have great respect for the man that comes and asks for his daughter. Such a man shows grit and integrity, a heart to do what is right and not what is necessarily easy.
Asking for a daughters hand will never go out of date or become old fashioned because raising a daughter will always require a form of sacrifice from the father to stay the course with love and time.
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